Gunga Bill

grandin42577_mp4So, in all of my years, I never watched or even considered watching Brian Williams on NBC Nightly News. It wasn’t that I had anything personal against Mr. Williams or even NBC, even though the network is responsible for the cancellation of the original series of Star Trek. Nor have I ever watched and listened to (at the same time) more than a minute of Bill O’Reilly on the Fox network. Again, I have nothing against Mr. O’Reilly or Fox, although they did cancel Married without Children without so much as a farewell show.

The point of all of this isn’t that networks cancelled my favorite entertainment shows, it’s that the current attacks on Bill O’Reilly were as predictable as a Klingon being grumpy or Kelly Bundy getting an A in Social Studies (she used her “assets” to get the grade).

The fall of a left news icon such a Williams, meant that anybody with hidden dirt on a right side network was going to come out soon, and sure enough, it’s happened. The fact that FOX News led the charge in getting rid of Williams – as if anybody was watching him anyway – all but guaranteed that at least one and probably more FOX anchors are going to face similar accusations. In this case, Bill O’Reilly is accused of lying about being the “only reporter on the street” during an Argentinean riot in Buenos Aires – which may or may not have been a “war zone” depending on if you were a Junta Member or a reporter – during the 1982 Falkland Islands War.

I’m not defending such an outrageous claim, but there are things to consider here. It’s possible that O’Reilly was drunk or that he actually may have thought he was the only guy out there. After all, the riot was likely more than a Ferguson block long and he may not have been able to see other reporters or have tripped over their camera people as he made his way from one end of the block to the other picking up orange earplugs and interviewing looters while tweeting about the tinderbox that was about to explode – live on my coverage! – as a part of his coverage of the riot. I’m just saying, if we’re going to critique riot coverage, let’s start with the gold standard of media “unprofessionalism,” and take a hard look at the Ferguson “coverage.”

In any case, the fall of Williams all but guaranteed that a Fox News seat was going to get hit and hit hard, but the real question is, why does anybody care?

By all accounts, virtually nobody watched Brian Williams, and even the appearance of his daughters ass (which is quite lovely) in a Lena Dunham TV show didn’t raise that many eyebrows. In fact, how may of you have no clue what I am talking about and would have to look it up (HERE) – if you even cared? Outside of 30 Rock, who even recognized Brian Williams?

Did O’Reilly lie about the riot? I don’t know. It’s one guys word against another guys word (who admits that he wasn’t really into the whole thing anyway and just wanted to go home). Not like all the guys in a helicopter or some such. I suppose that we could ask Argentina, but the truth is that since 1982 pretty much nobody has paid any attention to Buenos Aires. For all we know, it may not even be there anymore.

On the other hand, the only people who watch O’Reilly, according to a recent “Letter to the Editor” in the Modesto Bee, are all sociopathic racists who also are also stupid –  the letter writer quoted a study to prove it, so it must be true – so it’s pretty clear that he has to go as well.

By now, if we’ve learned anything from this, it’s that news people are petulant little bitches who all hate each other, talk about each other behind their collective backs, and will do anything and everything to convince an uninterested audience that they matter.

They don’t.

But some days, they can manage to be entertaining. Just not for the reasons that they want to be.


Posted on February 22, 2015, in News & Notes and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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